There’s a particular kind of doubt that doesn’t shout. It whispers. It says, You don’t really know what you’re doing.
Soon they’ll realise you’re not as capable as they think.
You were just lucky.

This experience, often referred to as Imposter Syndrome (more accurately, the imposter phenomenon), is far more common than we tend to admit. Research suggests that up to 70% of people will experience these feelings at some point in their lives.

And here’s something important: imposter feelings are not a diagnosis, a disorder, or proof that something is wrong with you. They are often situational. They tend to surface when we are stretching, growing, stepping into new roles, or operating in environments where performance is visible and scrutiny feels high.

In other words, they often show up precisely when we are expanding.

What Imposter Syndrome really is

Imposter Syndrome was first described in 1978 by psychologists Drs Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes. They noticed that many high-achieving women struggled to internalise their success. Despite degrees, promotions, praise and objective evidence of competence, these women privately believed they were frauds.

At its core, imposter syndrome rests on a painful belief: I am not good enough.

But it doesn’t always look dramatic. For some, it shows up as occasional worry before a presentation. For others, it becomes chronic self-doubt, fear of being “found out,” and deep shame around mistakes.

It exists on a continuum. And it can intensify during transitions – promotions, career changes, new responsibilities, motherhood, leadership, entrepreneurship. It often appears when we feel different from the dominant group around us. It can be especially strong in competitive or high-performing environments.

What many people don’t realise is that imposter feelings often affect conscientious, thoughtful, high-standard individuals. The very traits that make you good at your work can also make you vulnerable to self-doubt.

The Mind-Trap behind Imposter feelings

According to Dr Jessamy Hibberd, Imposter Syndrome usually emerges from a tension between two internal views:

• The image you hold of yourself versus what you believe others expect of you
• The standards you set for yourself versus how you judge your performance

When your internal self-image doesn’t match the competence others see, you may conclude that they must have an inflated view of you. The only explanation, your mind suggests, is that you’ve fooled them.

To cope with this tension, many people fall into one of two patterns:

Overworking.
You over-prepare. You work longer hours. You obsess over details. You try to control every variable so nothing exposes you.

Or

Avoidance.
You procrastinate. You hold back. You don’t apply for the promotion. You avoid asking for help. You stay under the radar.

Both strategies are understandable. They are protective. At some point, they likely helped you feel safer.

But here’s the problem: when you succeed after overworking, you attribute your success to the extra effort, not your competence. And when you avoid risk, you never gather evidence that you could have coped.

The cycle continues.

The different ways we define competence

One of the most helpful frameworks comes from Dr Valerie Young, who identified five “competence types” – different ways people define what it means to be capable.

The Perfectionist believes anything less than flawless performance equals failure.
The Superwoman or Superman feels pressure to excel in every role simultaneously.
The Natural Genius believes competence should be effortless.
The Soloist believes asking for help equals weakness.
The Expert feels they must know everything before they’re legitimate.

When you begin to notice your competence type, something shifts. You realise the issue isn’t your ability, it’s the definition of competence you’ve unconsciously adopted.

And often, those definitions are impossibly high.

A different way forward

If you don’t want to feel like an imposter, you can’t keep thinking like one.

But this isn’t about toxic positivity or forcing yourself to “just be confident.” It’s about changing your relationship with your inner experience.

A few practices that help:

1. Create distance from your inner critic

Rather than merging with the voice that says, You’re not good enough, begin to notice it as a voice, not the truth.

You might gently say,
Thank you for trying to protect me, but I’ve got this.

You don’t have to fight the voice. Just stop letting it run the show.

2. Gather evidence

Take time to write down your achievements – qualifications, promotions, projects completed, difficult seasons survived, people you’ve supported. Not to inflate your ego, but to counter selective memory.

Often, imposter thinking conveniently forgets the data.

3. Redefine competence

Competence does not mean perfection. It does not mean effortless. It does not mean doing everything alone.

Competence often means learning, adjusting, asking, growing, and showing up despite uncertainty.

4. Add self-compassion

If your best friend felt like a fraud, what would you say to them?

Can you offer even 10% of that kindness to yourself?

Imposter feelings shrink in environments of safety. They grow in environments of harsh self-judgement.

Perhaps the most important reframe

Imposter feelings are not proof that you are incapable. Often, they are evidence that you care deeply. That you hold yourself to high standards. That you are stepping into something meaningful. And growth almost always feels vulnerable.

So the next time that whisper shows up, instead of trying to silence it immediately, you might pause and say:

It makes sense that I feel this way. I’m stretching.

You don’t need to eliminate imposter syndrome to move forward. You simply need to relate to it differently.

With steadiness instead of panic.
With compassion instead of criticism.
With perspective instead of shame.

And that shift changes everything.